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These are the guidelines in a typical soap opera… The more you have, the soapier it gets

1. A fictitious setting
2. A popular hangout for most of the cast
3. Many catfights
4. Many brawls
5. A love triangle
6. Amnesia victims
7. Evil twins (better than evil siblings)
8. Evil siblings
9. A main sex symbol of the show
10. An awkward character
11. A Mr. or Mrs. Moneybags-(richest person in series)
12. When a character dies-the authors always have the creativity to resurrect that person in the future.
13. Unwanted pregnancy
14. Divorce is not required of every character-but 50% should be divorced at least once (should not exceed 20 times divorced)
15. Annulments are more rare than divorce, but it is satisfactory to be used in religious cases
16. An evil woman (a bad bitch, so to speak)
17. An evil man (a manipulator)
18. Beautiful people are a must-though throw in a common face once in awhile to make the show appear "real"
19. marriages have a time of bliss for only a month-then they are thrown into the ring with the rest of them
20. Sibling rivalry
21. A poor person becomes a well off person very soon after an appearance on the show
22. Poor dialogue
23. Bad acting
24. Events always brought up in the middle of a conversation (to help the viewer/reader remember past incidents that the character was involved in)
25. Bad taste of clothes for the "evil woman" or "misunderstood woman"
26. Good taste of clothes for the rest of the cast-except thrown in one or two outfits to make the viewer gag.
27. Generic jazz music should be played at the end of every high-climatic scene
28. Well known slow songs are used in romantic situations
29. There is always to be a "snoop" of the show-one who pries into everyone's personal life
30. An authors' pet - a character that the authors seem hooked to including him/her into every scene